I’m a geezer about town

Always partial to a bit of banter ‘n’ a laugh with the lads, 

That occasionally ends up in a scuffle or four!

Knocking heads, buckling legs;

You can always find me afterwards, nursing a beer in hand,

With an ever-ready smile, that instantly says to every lady (if you’d care to overlook an occasional black-eye):

‘I care that you’re here’

‘And you’ve made an effort to be beautiful’

‘I’m yours, if you’ll have me’;

‘And, I’ll treat you like the true lady you are’

Honestly, Gov: I live for Friday nights!

Nursing a hangover on most Saturdays;

I consider Sundays my day of rest; 

When I make an illegal homemade brew, that’ll surely make your balls explode!

Other times: I’m a wheeler-dealer; an artful dodger,

I’ve got my fingers in a few – strictly, non-legit – pies!

I make a living by taking my wears from door-to-door!

Lasses love me, 

Their asses feel my pain for 48 hours or more,

I always aim to please, 

But, the optional after-service is always free!

Y’see: it’s how I maintain a competitive edge in these hard economic times,

32 fags a day, I, insist:  keeps the doctor away

I scoff down cockles, jellied eels, mushy-peas &  fish ‘n’ chips, religiously;

Like the East End kid I am, through & through!

A charmed life I’ve led,

Skirting danger at every bend,

Likely facing an almighty brutal final end,

But, all said and done:

I’d rather rock out, than fade away, like most!